Archive for the ‘Just Plain Weird’ Category

By Ian Dransfield on Wednesday, July 29, 2009 at 4:00pm
Heckler Spray

The day the forces of the undead and the deaddead join together in an unholy union has arrived. Live in fear, peons.

For you see, the recently (the other year) died-but-didn’t Amy Winehouse has been haunted by the ghost of the recently (the other month) died-but-did Michael Jackson.

But why did Jackson visit her, of all people? Why, to warn her of the dangers of drugs, obviously.

It would seem his spirit learned faster than his body did.

Following on from the life-changing news that Amy Winehouse (”nearly”) died in her ex-husband’s arms we were all fooled into believing it was Blake Fielder-Civil’s advice that weaned her off the smackjuice.

How foolish we were to believe such a half-plausible thought.

No, it was actually Winehouse’s visit to a spirit medium during her self-imposed exile in the Caribbean that prompted her to really kick the habit.

According to a friend – the most reliable of sources, as we all know – and reported through the paper-we-didn’t-even-realise-was-still-going The People:

“She heard Michael’s voice telling her if she didn’t sort herself out she’d lose everything.”

Good advice from the deceased King of Pop, no doubt, but it does raise a couple of issues.

Firstly – Michael Jackson only died last month, and Amy Winehouse was away trying to sort herself for about a year. What this means is she was most likely doing a very poor job, having to not only wait until someone famous died, but also that they chose to come to her and instruct her to stop being a prat.

Secondly – it would seem like a bit of confusion from both parties in assuming an addiction to heroin and crack is the same as (an alleged) one to prescription painkillers. One is the result of psychological issues brought about by a physically and mentally scarring event in earlier life, whereas the other is the behaviour of a massive wanker. We’ll let you decide which is which.

It’s hard to actually accept this as anything but the insane ramblings of a few morons wanting to fill column inches (hello!), and some may argue that the world of spirits, mediums and hocus pocus is nothing but nonsensical garbage. Again though, we’ll let you decide what to think about Amy Winehouse’s St Lucian adventure.

Nevertheless, it’s good to see the ghost of Jacko taking up a role in public speaking – we reckon he’ll really be able to heal the world from beyond the grave.

We haven’t had the chance to migrate all the stories and encounters from our other website yet.